Thursday, August 26, 2010
Its Been A While...
I forgot about my blog!!! LOL :) Well, I am glad to be back! I have neglected my blog for a loooong time now, but I am back and have lots of stories and new photos to share!!
Monday, January 12, 2009
What I wanted to say, but couldn't
Yesterday was a remarkable day in the history of my life, as well as Zach. Yesterday we were baptized at Living Stones Church. There were many things I would have liked to said as the microphone was offered to me, needless to say, I just couldn't get the words from my brain to my mouth. Anyway, I just don't feel complete unless I share with you what I wish I would have said. Well I wouldn't have said quite all of it, but some of it...
Our God is a Great and Almighty God!! He has saved me from the very many bad decisions I have made in my past and given me a new beginning. I was baptized as in infant in the Lutheran Church and attended Zion Lutheran School from beginning to end. (8th grade). I went to church every Sunday with my mom up until I started High school. I then began to be led astray from the Lord. I made many wrong choices, and lived a life that I was ashamed of. I got a rude awakening in the summer of 2005, I was 16 years old sitting on the bathroom sink of a friends house waiting for the 3 minutes to be up that would decide my future... times up, results are in... PREGNANT! As tears began running down my cheeks, soon turning into sobs, I just couldn't believe what I had done... How could I have SERIOUSLY been so blind and careless to let this happen? The shamefulness, embarrassment... and worst of all, having to tell my mom and dad what I had done.
The story goes on, it was a long and hard 9 months and Zach and I were going through some pretty hard times with each other. Addisyn Paige was born on on March 28, 2006. I was 17 at this point and from the time that she was a couple weeks or months I suffered from depression. I didn't know it at the time and didn't really let it be known to others. My life was a downward spiral... fight after fight with Zach, going out and partying it up, and the guilt of not being the mother that I should have been. This went on for quite some time. Zach and I had split up a couple different times, and finally in the summer of 2007 we both grew up a bit and realized that our lives were in shambles and that it was time to grow up!
In the summer of 2007, we got quite another surprise!! We now call him Ryder. At this point we had started getting back into church a little bit, but definitely not enough. We got married in February of 2008. After Ryder was born we still hadn't completely given up some of the things that were corrupting our lives. I had somewhat of a problem with alcohol. Not everyday or every other day for that matter, but when we got a chance to go out, I would drink, and drink, and once I started I just kept it up all night. (And as hard as it is to put this out there for everyone to read, I believe it is part of my testimony and proof of how Great our God is!)
Zach and I continued to fight, and now it was even harder because we were married, and had two children that depended on us. At this point we were pretty much leading the double life, going to church, but also going out and doing things of ungodly nature. Every Sunday I would sit in church during praise and worship and feel tears, and my heart seriously aching... One Friday night I had a complete BREAKDOWN, I was sobbing, it was hard to catch my breath, guilt, shamefulness, regret, embarrassment, the fact that I was trying to be faithful to God, but could not give up my sinful ways had all consumed be, I was then completely overtaken by the Holy Spirit. I know it sounds crazy but I soon felt my heart change, God said I know you are tired of living the way you are so I'm here tonight to show you that you can't have both, its ME or the other things of your life. I finally realized after so long of living unhappily, that ALL I HAD TO DO was give up the bad things that I was doing and GIVE IT ALL TO GOD!!! I did, I just kept crying and crying and saying I don't want that life anymore, I can't live like that, I DON"T WANT TO!!! I made a decision that night that things were going to change for me. After that night, I became a new woman. When I went to church, I have gave in to those feelings and just cried and cried and cried, I threw my hands up in the air and praised GOD for the second chance He had given me.
Now, sitting here almost sobbing, I have realized that even though I wasn't walking with God through all of my hardships and troubled times, He sure was walking with me even though I didn't know it.
Even though I was still growing in my faith again, and attending church regularly, I was still dealing with some of the shame of my past. It was really hard to let go of some of the things that I had done, and failed to do. As of yesterday, I am washing it away and letting go and moving on. I will not feel embarrassed of being a young mother for one more day. The Lord has cleansed me of all unrighteousness, and I am starting a new walk with Christ. I am excited and can not wait to see what is in store for Zach and I as we move forward with the Lord. AMEN!
Our God is a Great and Almighty God!! He has saved me from the very many bad decisions I have made in my past and given me a new beginning. I was baptized as in infant in the Lutheran Church and attended Zion Lutheran School from beginning to end. (8th grade). I went to church every Sunday with my mom up until I started High school. I then began to be led astray from the Lord. I made many wrong choices, and lived a life that I was ashamed of. I got a rude awakening in the summer of 2005, I was 16 years old sitting on the bathroom sink of a friends house waiting for the 3 minutes to be up that would decide my future... times up, results are in... PREGNANT! As tears began running down my cheeks, soon turning into sobs, I just couldn't believe what I had done... How could I have SERIOUSLY been so blind and careless to let this happen? The shamefulness, embarrassment... and worst of all, having to tell my mom and dad what I had done.
The story goes on, it was a long and hard 9 months and Zach and I were going through some pretty hard times with each other. Addisyn Paige was born on on March 28, 2006. I was 17 at this point and from the time that she was a couple weeks or months I suffered from depression. I didn't know it at the time and didn't really let it be known to others. My life was a downward spiral... fight after fight with Zach, going out and partying it up, and the guilt of not being the mother that I should have been. This went on for quite some time. Zach and I had split up a couple different times, and finally in the summer of 2007 we both grew up a bit and realized that our lives were in shambles and that it was time to grow up!
In the summer of 2007, we got quite another surprise!! We now call him Ryder. At this point we had started getting back into church a little bit, but definitely not enough. We got married in February of 2008. After Ryder was born we still hadn't completely given up some of the things that were corrupting our lives. I had somewhat of a problem with alcohol. Not everyday or every other day for that matter, but when we got a chance to go out, I would drink, and drink, and once I started I just kept it up all night. (And as hard as it is to put this out there for everyone to read, I believe it is part of my testimony and proof of how Great our God is!)
Zach and I continued to fight, and now it was even harder because we were married, and had two children that depended on us. At this point we were pretty much leading the double life, going to church, but also going out and doing things of ungodly nature. Every Sunday I would sit in church during praise and worship and feel tears, and my heart seriously aching... One Friday night I had a complete BREAKDOWN, I was sobbing, it was hard to catch my breath, guilt, shamefulness, regret, embarrassment, the fact that I was trying to be faithful to God, but could not give up my sinful ways had all consumed be, I was then completely overtaken by the Holy Spirit. I know it sounds crazy but I soon felt my heart change, God said I know you are tired of living the way you are so I'm here tonight to show you that you can't have both, its ME or the other things of your life. I finally realized after so long of living unhappily, that ALL I HAD TO DO was give up the bad things that I was doing and GIVE IT ALL TO GOD!!! I did, I just kept crying and crying and saying I don't want that life anymore, I can't live like that, I DON"T WANT TO!!! I made a decision that night that things were going to change for me. After that night, I became a new woman. When I went to church, I have gave in to those feelings and just cried and cried and cried, I threw my hands up in the air and praised GOD for the second chance He had given me.
Now, sitting here almost sobbing, I have realized that even though I wasn't walking with God through all of my hardships and troubled times, He sure was walking with me even though I didn't know it.
Even though I was still growing in my faith again, and attending church regularly, I was still dealing with some of the shame of my past. It was really hard to let go of some of the things that I had done, and failed to do. As of yesterday, I am washing it away and letting go and moving on. I will not feel embarrassed of being a young mother for one more day. The Lord has cleansed me of all unrighteousness, and I am starting a new walk with Christ. I am excited and can not wait to see what is in store for Zach and I as we move forward with the Lord. AMEN!
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
Potty Training and Erasers
I cannot express how excited and PROUD of my Addisyn, who now wears BIG GIRL PANTIES!!! :) It has only been a week, but I feel like this is it this time... after many trial runs as I call them, of potty training. She just needed a little practice thats all! It makes me so happy to see the happiness she has in herself of doing it on her own!
The magic of Erasers....
Addi and I were coloring one afternoon, and we found a regular pencil in the box and she started using it. I thought to myself, I bet she would be intigued to learn that she should erase whatever she drew! Oh yes, I showed her and I think we went through an entire eraser to one pencil and about two otheres. As the day went on the idea of erasers slowly faded away, or so I thought. I was doing some things around the house and Addi comes running and screaming "mommy mommy my eyebrows, lets go see in the mirror, there gone, lets go see!!!!" I said WHAT, calm down, What are you talking about. She says to me, I erased them, lets go see the mirror, I want to see!! All I could do was laugh, and then explain to her that she could only erase the pencil drawings... she was a little upset that she couldnt erase whatever she wanted with it!!
The magic of Erasers....
Addi and I were coloring one afternoon, and we found a regular pencil in the box and she started using it. I thought to myself, I bet she would be intigued to learn that she should erase whatever she drew! Oh yes, I showed her and I think we went through an entire eraser to one pencil and about two otheres. As the day went on the idea of erasers slowly faded away, or so I thought. I was doing some things around the house and Addi comes running and screaming "mommy mommy my eyebrows, lets go see in the mirror, there gone, lets go see!!!!" I said WHAT, calm down, What are you talking about. She says to me, I erased them, lets go see the mirror, I want to see!! All I could do was laugh, and then explain to her that she could only erase the pencil drawings... she was a little upset that she couldnt erase whatever she wanted with it!!
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
Broccoli Cheese Soup and Grahm Cracker Dessert
Broccoli Cheese Soup
2 bunches of broccoli (I use about one head)
2 cups red potatoes cleaned and chopped (I use about three or four med. size)
1/2 Cup onion ( I always use less)
2 (14 oz.) cans chicken broth
2 cans condensed cream of chicken ( I only use one, I think that two gives the soup a little too much weird flavor)
1/2 of a velveeta cheese block (you could also use a 12 oz package of cheddar cheese) I just like velveeta better, I think that it is creamier
Since I only use one cream of chicken I usually add a little milk so its not too thick
I also like to put celery in it, usually about two stalks chopped very fine (might as well get in as many veggies for the kids while you can!! :)
Parboil potatoes for about 10 min. don't let them cook all the way
Drain the water.
Add chicken broth, broccoli, and onion, and if you wanted any other veggies
Boil for about 20 minutes or until potatoes and broccoli are soft
Reduce to simmer.
Add cream of chicken soup and cheese.
Stir continuosly to prevent cheese from burning.
Heat thoroughly and SERVE AND ENJOY!!!
CRACKER DESSERT
Enough grahm crackers to cover the bottom of a 9x13 baking sheet. I think there is about a package and a half of them that will fit. You can leave them whole or break them in half.
6 squares Bakers semi sweet baking chocolate
1/2 cup peanut butter, crunchy or smooth whatever you prefer
3 squares Bakers white baking chocolate
I line the bottem of the pan with foil, it makes it easeier to clean up, then cover with grahm crackers.
Microwave semi sweet chocolate and peanut butter, check it every 30 sec. to prevent burning and always stir it each time.
When it is all melted pour it over the grahm crackers, spread with spatula to covor completely.
Repeat microwaving steps with white chocolate.
When it is all melted drop spoonfuls of it over chocolate covered grahms.
Immediately cut through the chocolate mixtures with a knife several times to get that marble look.
I cover with foil and put it in the fridge for AT LEAST an hour to harden.
2 bunches of broccoli (I use about one head)
2 cups red potatoes cleaned and chopped (I use about three or four med. size)
1/2 Cup onion ( I always use less)
2 (14 oz.) cans chicken broth
2 cans condensed cream of chicken ( I only use one, I think that two gives the soup a little too much weird flavor)
1/2 of a velveeta cheese block (you could also use a 12 oz package of cheddar cheese) I just like velveeta better, I think that it is creamier
Since I only use one cream of chicken I usually add a little milk so its not too thick
I also like to put celery in it, usually about two stalks chopped very fine (might as well get in as many veggies for the kids while you can!! :)
Parboil potatoes for about 10 min. don't let them cook all the way
Drain the water.
Add chicken broth, broccoli, and onion, and if you wanted any other veggies
Boil for about 20 minutes or until potatoes and broccoli are soft
Reduce to simmer.
Add cream of chicken soup and cheese.
Stir continuosly to prevent cheese from burning.
Heat thoroughly and SERVE AND ENJOY!!!
CRACKER DESSERT
Enough grahm crackers to cover the bottom of a 9x13 baking sheet. I think there is about a package and a half of them that will fit. You can leave them whole or break them in half.
6 squares Bakers semi sweet baking chocolate
1/2 cup peanut butter, crunchy or smooth whatever you prefer
3 squares Bakers white baking chocolate
I line the bottem of the pan with foil, it makes it easeier to clean up, then cover with grahm crackers.
Microwave semi sweet chocolate and peanut butter, check it every 30 sec. to prevent burning and always stir it each time.
When it is all melted pour it over the grahm crackers, spread with spatula to covor completely.
Repeat microwaving steps with white chocolate.
When it is all melted drop spoonfuls of it over chocolate covered grahms.
Immediately cut through the chocolate mixtures with a knife several times to get that marble look.
I cover with foil and put it in the fridge for AT LEAST an hour to harden.
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